In all this randomness I try to keep one constant thing... my yoga practice. I need to make sure that in this crazy time my inner peace remains intact. The core of my daily yoga practice addresses issues of the laziness in the 60s when it is much easier to eat and drink than to do any physical exercise.
No I don't know where I'm going
But, I sure know where I've been
Hanging on the promises
In songs of yesterday
And I've made up my mind
I ain't wasting no more time
I have declared July as a month of ashtanga yoga. I've started yoga challenge with the goal to do yoga everyday. There are only one rule: 60 minutes of every day ashtanga half primary yoga practice... for the 30 days.
Yoga can be anything as you want it to be. For me it is a physical as well as spiritual pursuit, a kind of meditation, it is a clearly kind of separating my "I AM" sense while keeping my body toned, strong and flexible. It is a way to fight stress and the challenges of everyday living.
Let me be clear, I don’t practice ashtanga yoga because I like it. Well I don't. Who can like this bending, stretching and sweating everyday. I practice because I must. I'm 60 and at this age, it starts all kind of the health problems.
My yoga is an alternative health care. So far, being lucky I have no problem serious health issues with back pain, cholesterol, diabetes, arthritis... I strongly believe in yoga and I take that regular practice and the sweat cleaning the organs of my body.
It is hard. My muscles are sore and I am tired after the practice. Sometimes, I had to take Tylenol after the practice. But I must continue...
I’m sorry to say, if you’re looking for fancy yoga photos, you won’t find it here. I'm not an expert, or teacher or advanced practitioner. I practice Ashtanga yoga since May 2006 and my practice did not change, it sucks big time.
When the inevitable truth of aging confronts us in the mirror we don’t react well. "Oh, you don’t look your age!" became a great compliment. I say, fuck that! I am not scared getting old, are you scared?
In my life I have a very simple goal - to attain self-realization. But to accomplish that goal I have to eradicate myself. The "I" who wants enlightenment has to be annihilated. It is this shitty "Zee" personality that has to go, it must evaporate and nothing else should replace it. So even my life's goal is very simple it is almost impossible.
The majority of the people in the 60s are overweight, busy with their work, under all kinds of stress, very serious. It is very important to do some physical exercise that is a part of daily schedule and then make it a steady habit.
Yoga is my thing. I practice and struggle alone. It might be boring after a while but it helps to develop the body sense bringing a lot of health benefits. It is important to learn and practice yoga postures under the supervision of a trained yoga teacher for a time before you can fully be on your own at your home practice.
People see life like a roller coaster of ups and downs. They are after chronic search for happiness, always pretending they are happy and successful but deep down disappointed and frustrated.
They never have time to turn within and see how they exists, what and who is this identity they suppose to have. They decide nothing, there is no choice for them, they live life answering the shocks from the outside. They don't know any better, and they don't know the reason why they don't know any better.
An unfortunate pitfall of 60s is that we feel disappointed and we feel hurt by life. Kids are left, we're divorced, overweight, our sleep pattern is disturbed, we have started drinking, we have started panicking about health issues, we have started asking ourselves "is this all there is".
After 60 we have reached maturity, we have a dog in order to have somebody to love us because no one else does that anymore. We have the feeling as if we are unseen and unheard, although we still have hope but dammit if I know what we're hoping for. We are feeling lifeless, sexless and lost in time and space.
I have come to the point of understanding and I openly say - Hey, wait a minute, this life is nuts! I got out of this merry-go-round circle of daily waking up, working and sleeping again. Work is not everything in life, it brings money, I work as much as I need to pay my bills, that's all. I have awareness.
I hold onto "I AM" sense day and night, observing myself. I create the experience of my reality. I live life trying to erase these glasses that thoughts have made it. Daily retrospective, quiet periods of simple awareness, the presence is what I'm after. I don't say meditation but some quiet, alone time is necessary for me.
Socrates said the un-examined life is not worth living. He meant that
the stagnated, home-work-home, repetitive life is not worth living.
Practically he is saying that most people's lives are not worth the
bother.
People don't understand that the universe is an interactive game, it will give everyone whatever they want. That is how it works. You don't have to be worthy, but you have to know what it is that you really want. Unfortunately, if you don't know which road to take, you don't pay
attention to the crossroads... These crossroads are not what you
think they are... they are simple points in daily life when you get
offended.
Whenever you get offended by words or by some actions it means you have a
strong personality, a strong "character". I know that you suffer a lot.
Instead watching and questioning why you have been offended you look and
blame others.
I'm not a spiritual guru, an advanced yoga practitioner, a fitness teacher,
or a healthy diet teacher, not even a great blog writer. I write here what
I'm interested in at present moment. I have no advice for you.
Do whatever fuck you want to do. As for myself, I will continue to investigate "I AM" sense taking care of
the present moment...
I know one thing, greater personality more suffering. Give up whatever you
have learned, get rid of "what other will think of you". Abide in
yourself. You know "you are". How do you know "you are"? Find
out. Investigate by being there. Look, focus only on your knowing that "you are".
"You are" is the greatest miracle in this world. When and how "you are". How did it happen? Because of what you know "you are"? Have a
firm conviction that "you are" is only simple presence without body
and mind, thoughts, beliefs, imagination, it is just a knowledge. You are beyond it.
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